The selling of New Zealand by our prime minister 19 Sep 2014
Related articles
- NZ consumers grow more upbeat, may resume spending Business
- Brownlee Leads Aviation Mission To Shanghai News
- NZ migration bolstered by British invasion Migration
- Sludge Report #192: The Naked Budget Columns
- Budget 2010 – Building the Recovery News
- NZ manufacturing activity reaches highest since 04 Business
- Unemployment rate falls from 7.1 to 6 percent Recruitment
- Licensing To Cut Out Cowboy Advisers Migration
- Government Widens Drought Assistance News
- Young People Take Over Parliament News
The selling of New Zealand by our prime
minister
By Charles Drace19 September 2014
Author’s Note: this is a work of fiction, at least I hope it is, but like all fiction there may be elements of truth.
It was a dark and stormy night (naturally). Gathered around the massive rosewood boardroom table at a Goldman Sachs’ type bank headquarters in London sat the heads of some of the world’s most influential banks, oil companies, mining companies and chemical and pharmaceutical companies.
Placed in front of each guest is a bottle of Oval Swarovski Crystal Vodka, Royal Salute 50 yr old Chivas Regal Scotch or Hardy Le Printemps Cognac plus $400 dollar bottles of Kona Nigari Water beside crystal glasses. There are no pads of paper, pens, recording machines or cell phones.
Though known to each other through long association in the multi-national company world, they have asked me to keep their names a secret so I will refer to them only by initials: GS, JPM, BOA, DB, ML, IMF, WB, ROT, WP, ANA, SHE, MOB, NEW, RIO, DOW, MON, ELI, MER, plus additional members of Bilderberg and the Trilateral Commission.
There were many others who will not be called to participate in the conversation but will listen and implement the decisions. They had coffee and Coca Cola bottled water.
JPM: We had tremendous success with the Labour government of the 1980’s selling us New Zealand assets at fire sale prices and many of us enjoyed the profits over the next 20 years.
ROS: We’ve also seen the so-called rich/poor gap widen tremendously since then which suits our purposes and our desires.
GS: Yes, it’s good to see the standard of living of the middle and lower classes being reduced and wages and salaries turning into exportable corporate profits.
ANZ: Even though they could not come to this meeting, unfortunately, I think we should all toast the remarkable success of New Zealand’s Business Roundtable in helping us achieve our goals. Having mostly foreign or foreign controlled companies as members has made it easy for us to influence them but their effectiveness was more than we ever imagined.
All: Cheers, cheers.
MON: However, there is much to be done. For instance, even though successive governments have let us fill New Zealand’s grocery shelves with over 750 genetically engineered foods, they still won’t let us grow GE foods there and that means our herbicide and pesticide profits are only a third of what they could be.
MER: And their ridiculous Pharmac is buying billions of dollars of generic medicines. Those billions should be going into patented drugs.
ANA: There are large deposits of oil offshore. At over 2500 metres it is too deep for our current technology but it won’t be long before our technology catches up. We plan to drill to 1500 metres in the deepwater of the Gulf of Mexico and if that works drilling to over 2000 metres off New Zealand should be feasible.
RIO: New Zealand has quite a few resources we’d like to get our hands on like coal, gold, rare earths in the seabeds, etc. but most of the areas we’d like to explore are tied up in national parks and reserves or with major legal hoops to jump through like the Resource Management Act. And we must prevent any action on climate change that affects our profits.
IMF: We agree, it’s time to open up New Zealand again and get their assets transferred to the major multi-nationals who can exploit them properly.
GS: Well, the financial industry is ready to facilitate the transfer of assets. We made billions out of Rogernomics. What we need is to get control of the New Zealand government.
WP: From our successful experience I would submit that the prime minister of New Zealand has major influence. In fact, I would go so far as to say that if we could get the right person elected as prime minister he mostly likely could get the laws passed to sell the assets to our ready purchasers and open up the marketplace to almost total control by the companies we here, tonight, represent.
ML: Interestingly enough, I think we’ve got just the right guy.
MER: Who do you have in mind?
ML: Perhaps its best to keep his name under wraps at this stage, but we recently instructed him to close one of our London trading offices and move it to Ireland for tax purposes. He was very effective. He had to fire hundreds of staff members but did so efficiently and without fuss. Our employees call him ‘The Smiling Assassin’ or ‘Shonkey’ but to us at headquarters he is just ‘our man.’
GS: I think I know who you mean. We recently consulted him on the best way for us to get the contract to sell New Zealand’s electricity assets.
MER: How would we go about it?
WP: As you know we have almost 150 years experience in New Zealand, so if I may make a suggestion. It would not be difficult to use our resources to convince a sitting MP in a safe tory seat to step down. We could put your man in that seat, use our influence and those of our partners to push him into the leadership position and then get him elected as prime minister.
JPM: Then after he gets elected we could convince him to pass a law giving overseas corporations the right to make unlimited campaign contributions. That should keep him in place as long as we need him. After all, once the assets are in our hands there is no way New Zealand could get them back.
NEW: Yes, and after he’s opened up the reserves to mining....
ANA: And the oceans to deep sea oil drilling!
GS: And sold productive, income earning assets like the electricity companies, we should have the Trans-Pacific Partnership agreement ready for him to sign.
MON: Yes, once that’s signed we will have more or less total control of commerce in New Zealand and enjoy our profits until the assets run out.
ELI: We must make sure there is a clause in the TPPA allowing us to sue the New Zealand government if they allow any impediments to sales as well as our purchases of New Zealand companies and assets. We’re readying a suit against Canada under the North American Free Trade Agreement which should be ultra lucrative for us and teach the Canadians not to get in our way again.
DB: We’ll also need to convince him to borrow billions every year. I think he’ll be happy to do that because it will make the economy look good even though it will really be in recession. I would guess that about $9 billion a year would do the trick.
IMF: We’re ready to help. After all, we’ve helped move assets into foreign corporate control in many countries around the globe. Once New Zealand reaches unsupportable debt levels then your man can appeal to the IMF. We can then impose the normal IMF requirements to sell off all assets and reduce pensions, social support, health support, etc. That will open up even more opportunities for our friendly corporations to fill the voids.
DOW: So, is that our plan? Are we all agreed?
All: Agreed. Agreed. Agreed.
© Charles Drace 2014
News
Hilary Timmins' Award-Winning UK Documentary Series To Inspire NZ Students
29 Jun 2020 Education
Dream Catchers, produced and directed by Hilary Timmins, celebrates the success stories of more than thirty inspirational New... more
New Zealand reaffirms support for Flight MH17 judicial process
7 Mar 2020 News
Ahead of the start of the criminal trial in the Netherlands on 9 March, Foreign Minister Winston Peters has reaffirmed the need to... more
Business
NZ Government's Economic package to fight COVID-19
17 Mar 2020 Business News
The Coalition Government has launched the most significant peace-time economic plan in modern New Zealand history to cushion the... more
NZ Government announces aviation relief package
19 Mar 2020 Business News
Transport Minister Phil Twyford today outlined the first tranche of the $600 million aviation sector relief package announced earlier... more
Living
Diversity was Key at New Zealand Trade Tasting in London
6 Jun 2022 Food & Wine
New Zealand Winegrowers Annual Trade Tasting was recently held in London, on Wednesday 4 May, in Lindley Hall.
It was the first... more
Kiwi author stuns Behind the Butterfly Gate
12 Jan 2022 Arts
Hidden behind the Butterfly Gate is where the secret has been kept for 76 years...
New Zealand writer Merryn Corcoran’s... more
Property
Fairer rules for tenants and landlords
17 Nov 2019 Property
17 NOVEMBER 2019
The Government has delivered on its promise to the over one million New Zealanders who now rent to make it fairer... more
New Zealand Government will not implement a Capital Gains Tax
17 Apr 2019 Property
The Coalition Government will not proceed with the Tax Working Group’s recommendation for a capital gains tax, Jacinda Ardern... more
Migration
Boosting border security with electronic travel authority – now over 500,000 issued
19 Nov 2019 Migration
19 NOVEMBER 2019
We’ve improved border security with the NZeTA, New Zealand Electronic Travel Authority, which helps us to... more
Christchurch reinstated as refugee settlement location
18 Aug 2018 Migration
18 AUGUST 2018
HON IAIN LEES-GALLOWAY
The announcement that Christchurch can once again be a settlement location for refugees... more
Travel
Gallipoli Anzac Day services cancelled
19 Mar 2020 Travel & Tourism
The New Zealand and Australian Governments have announced this year’s joint Anzac Day services at Gallipoli will be cancelled... more
New Zealanders advised not to travel overseas
19 Mar 2020 Travel & Tourism
New Zealanders advised not to travel overseas
more
Sport
The Skipper's Diary: Sir Richard Hadlee honouring his father and NZ's Forty-Niners
27 Oct 2019 Cricket
NZNewsUK London Editor Charlotte Everett spoke to Sir Richard Hadlee about why he’s chosen to publish his father’s... more
PREVIEW: All Blacks v England semi-final
26 Oct 2019 Rugby
The two most convincing quarterfinals winners are set to square off in a semifinal showdown for the ages when the All Blacks meet old... more
Columns
Gordon Campbell on the Gareth Morgan crusade
11 Nov 2016 Opinion
Gordon Campbell on the Gareth Morgan crusade
First published on Werewolf
The ghastly likes of Marine Le Pen in France and Geert ... more
Gordon Campbell on the US election outcome
10 Nov 2016 Opinion
Column - Gordon Campbell
Gordon Campbell on the US election outcome
Well um.. on the bright side, there (probably)... more
Kiwi Success
Congratulations to Loder Cup winner
26 Sep 2018 People
25 SEPTEMBER 2018
The Loder Cup, one of New Zealand’s oldest conservation awards, has been awarded to Robert McGowan for 2018... more
Appointments to New Zealand National Commission for UNESCO
16 Aug 2018 Appointments
16 AUGUST 2018Appointments to New Zealand National Commission for UNESCO
HON JENNY SALESA
Associate Education Minister Jenny Salesa is... more
Recruitment
Historic pay equity settlement for education support workers
14 Aug 2018 Recruitment
14 AUGUST 2018Historic pay equity settlement for education support workers
RT HON JACINDA ARDERN
HON CHRIS HIPKINS
Prime Minister
The... more
Historic pay equity settlement for education support workers
22 Aug 2018 Recruitment
14 AUGUST 2018Historic pay equity settlement for education support workers
RT HON JACINDA ARDERN
HON CHRIS HIPKINS
Prime Minister
The... more