Putting the ‘holy’ back into holiday - the holistic helper's guide to wellbeing and work: part 7   15 Jul 2014

Tricia Alach

Click for a larger image

Tricia Alach

Related articles

• New Zealand hosts World Health Organisation meeting News

Holidays should be sacrosanct, used to recharge and reconnect with yourself and whoever you've gone on holiday with. But for so many professionals going on holiday just means taking the Blackberry to the beach and never really taking time to stop. There is evidence that we know this behaviour is dysfunctional and maybe even a little 'naughty' with people reporting the lengths they go to in order to have a sneaky peak at their email - waiting until partners are in the shower or sneaking onto the balcony in the middle of the night for example.

Know thyself, grow thyself

If you are one of those people who really finds it hard to switch off and not work while on holiday, you might want to spend some time trying to figure out why. I'm sure that what you tell people is that it's to do with your professionalism and desire to continue to support the team back in the office BUT in my experience of working with workaholics, there is usually something else going on. So, take a moment for self-reflection and see if any of these sound familiar...

Fear of missing out (FOMO): long before there was social media, there were people who hated to be away from the office because of a fear of missing out.  This might mean missing out on contributing to a decision, missing out on knowing what's going on (especially if there are rumours of change) or even just missing out on the social side of things, if they have a lot of workplace friends.

A tendency to co-dependency: while it’s quite common to have a slight need to feel needed, some people genuinely feel at their best when things go wrong and they can swoop in to save the day. One of the worst things for a co-dependent person to hear is that their team will cope fine without them because this calls into question their whole reason for being. This will often lead to them (consciously or unconsciously) behaving in ways that necessitate team members contacting them on holiday which in turn reinforces their belief that they are needed, even if they're really not.

You don't trust your team: a lot of managers simply don't trust their teams which, as every good talent manager knows, reflects a failing on their part as manager, not on the team. If you cannot go on holiday without checking up on your team every day, you are dealing with a situation that has been months if not years in the making AND is not helped by micro-managing from afar.

Your work has become your escape from your life: sometimes it’s when people go on holiday that they realise how unhappy they are in their personal life and in this sense, being able to spend a few hours a day checking emails actually provides an escape from an uncomfortable situation they don't want to have to deal with.

You just can't stop: sometimes the simplest reason we can't relax and disconnect on holiday is that we've worked ourselves up into such a state that we simply can't switch off our minds and stop. This one even applies to holistic health therapists who should know better but don't...

Some simple strategies that might help leave the office behind

Remove temptation: it's quite hard to check emails and do any work if you've left your blackberry and laptop in the office. So keeping it really simple, just don't take your tech on holiday and the problem will go away

Only give your team a landline on which to contact you: if you have created a little dependency in your team and you think is now the time to stop it, only give them the landline line number of the hotel or place you are staying. It’s super easy to ping off an email, making a phone call is much more effort and you may find your team actually prefers to figure it out for themselves

Or give them no option: alternatively, if you don't provide any contact details while you are on holiday people will not contact you which also solves the problem. My guess is that they'll be quite happy with this, it might be you who has to make more of an adjustment

Go somewhere with stuff to do: distraction is a great way to forget about work. Spending 2 weeks lying on a beach might sound like a great idea when you're stuck in the middle of a UK winter but it can get pretty boring and when you're bored and you have nothing else to do, it’s no surprise you'll be tempted to work. So instead of a beach holiday, take yourself of trekking, on a yoga retreat or some other activity laden adventure which keeps you so focused on the present you don't think about work AT ALL

Think of not replying as a gift: if you really can't help yourself checking up on emails, at least stop yourself from replying. Sometimes people send emails to those they know are on holiday because they don't want them to reply. So, if you've said you're out of the office, stay out of the office - at least so far as they know.

Replace FOMO with YOLO: you do only live once so don't waste time wondering what's going on in places where you are not. Focus on being where you are and making the most of that experience because you will not have that time again.

Remember time out is better than burnout

Taking time out and time off is really important to our health and wellbeing AND to our ability to continue to do well at work. The stress/performance curve shows that we have limit in terms of how far we can push ourselves before we start to do more harm than good and not taking breaks is one way of getting to this limit even faster.

My advice is to book your holidays BEFORE you feel like you need them so you can actually spend the time doing something interesting and having some fun instead of just sleeping and trying to ward off the early signs of burnout.

Far from inhibiting your ability to perform and be successful in your chosen field, taking regular holidays will help you reconnect to your body and replenish your spirit thus reenergising you for your return to the office. It can also be a time to take stock, regain perspective and recalibrate your efforts towards those things that are truly most important to you rather than simply continuing to shuffle along on the treadmill of mindless routine.

About the author:

London based Natural Therapist and Wellness Coach, Tricia Alach specialises in working with busy people who want to relax, rebalance and revitalise their lives. Visit www.flowmindandbody.com or follow her @tricialach or on facebook for tips on how to live happier, healthier and more holistically in each and every day.

Holidays should be sacrosanct, used to recharge and reconnect with yourself and whoever you've gone on holiday with. But for so many professionals going on holiday just means taking the blackberry to the beach and never really taking time to stop. There is evidence that we know this behaviour is dysfunctional and maybe even a little 'naughty' with people reporting the lengths they go to in order to have a sneaky peak at their email - waiting until partners are in the shower or sneaking onto the balcony in the middle of the night for example.

Know thyself, grow thyself

If you are one of those people who really finds it hard to switch off and not work while on holiday, you might want to spend some time trying to figure out why. I'm sure that what you tell people is that it's to do with your professionalism and desire to continue to support the team back in the office BUT in my experience of working with workaholics, there is usually something else going on. So, take a moment for self-reflection and see if any of these sound familiar...

Fear of missing out (FOMO): long before there was social media, there were people who hated to be away from the office because of a fear of missing out.  This might mean missing out on contributing to a decision, missing out on knowing what's going on (especially if there are rumours of change) or even just missing out on the social side of things, if they have a lot of workplace friends.

A tendency to co-dependency: while it’s quite common to have a slight need to feel needed, some people genuinely feel at their best when things go wrong and they can swoop in to save the day. One of the worst things for a co-dependent person to hear is that their team will cope fine without them because this calls into question their whole reason for being. This will often lead to them (consciously or unconsciously) behaving in ways that necessitate team members contacting them on holiday which in turn reinforces their belief that they are needed, even if they're really not.

You don't trust your team: a lot of managers simply don't trust their teams which, as every good talent manager knows, reflects a failing on their part as manager, not on the team. If you cannot go on holiday without checking up on your team every day, you are dealing with a situation that has been months if not years in the making AND is not helped by micro-managing from afar.

Your work has become your escape from your life: sometimes it’s when people go on holiday that they realise how unhappy they are in their personal life and in this sense, being able to spend a few hours a day checking emails actually provides an escape from an uncomfortable situation they don't want to have to deal with.

You just can't stop: sometimes the simplest reason we can't relax and disconnect on holiday is that we've worked ourselves up into such a state that we simply can't switch off our minds and stop. This one even applies to holistic health therapists who should know better but don't...

Some simple strategies that might help leave the office behind

Remove temptation: it's quite hard to check emails and do any work if you've left your blackberry and laptop in the office. So keeping it really simple, just don't take your tech on holiday and the problem will go away

Only give your team a landline on which to contact you: if you have created a little dependency in your team and you think is now the time to stop it, only give them the landline line number of the hotel or place you are staying. It’s super easy to ping off an email, making a phone call is much more effort and you may find your team actually prefers to figure it out for themselves

Or give them no option: alternatively, if you don't provide any contact details while you are on holiday people will not contact you which also solves the problem. My guess is that they'll be quite happy with this, it might be you who has to make more of an adjustment

Go somewhere with stuff to do: distraction is a great way to forget about work. Spending 2 weeks lying on a beach might sound like a great idea when you're stuck in the middle of a UK winter but it can get pretty boring and when you're bored and you have nothing else to do, it’s no surprise you'll be tempted to work. So instead of a beach holiday, take yourself of trekking, on a yoga retreat or some other activity laden adventure which keeps you so focused on the present you don't think about work AT ALL

Think of not replying as a gift: if you really can't help yourself checking up on emails, at least stop yourself from replying. Sometimes people send emails to those they know are on holiday because they don't want them to reply. So, if you've said you're out of the office, stay out of the office - at least so far as they know.

Replace FOMO with YOLO: you do only live once so don't waste time wondering what's going on in places where you are not. Focus on being where you are and making the most of that experience because you will not have that time again.

Remember time out is better than burnout

Taking time out and time off is really important to our health and wellbeing AND to our ability to continue to do well at work. The stress/performance curve shows that we have limit in terms of how far we can push ourselves before we start to do more harm than good and not taking breaks is one way of getting to this limit even faster.

My advice is to book your holidays BEFORE you feel like you need them so you can actually spend the time doing something interesting and having some fun instead of just sleeping and trying to ward off the early signs of burnout.

Far from inhibiting your ability to perform and be successful in your chosen field, taking regular holidays will help you reconnect to your body and replenish your spirit thus reenergising you for your return to the office. It can also be a time to take stock, regain perspective and recalibrate your efforts towards those things that are truly most important to you rather than simply continuing to shuffle along on the treadmill of mindless routine.

About the author:

London based Natural Therapist and Wellness Coach, Tricia Alach specialises in working with busy people who want to relax, rebalance and revitalise their lives. Visit www.flowmindandbody.com or follow her @tricialach or on facebook for tips on how to live happier, healthier and more holistically in each and every day.

Add a comment